Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 1

Poetry, philosophy, and physics all teach us that we don’t experience time in equal increments.

Answer 1

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 2

Grief is a demanding companion.

Answer 2

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 3

Ordinary events became land mines.

Answer 3

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 4

Let the story reveal itself. He doesn’t start each project knowing where the tale will end because it has to unfold in its own way and in its own time.

Answer 4

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 5

Worried that I would try to control my grief, he encouraged me to listen to it, keep it close, and let it run its course.

Answer 5

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 6

“No one ever told me,” C. S. Lewis wrote, “that grief felt so like fear. ” The fear was constant and it felt like the grief would never subside. The waves would continue to crash over me until I was no longer standing, no longer myself.

Answer 6

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 7

After losing a parent, many children are surprisingly resilient. They go on to have happy childhoods and become well-adjusted adults.

Answer 7

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 8

By six months, more than half of people who lose a spouse are past what psychologists classify as “acute grief. ”.

Answer 8

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 9

We don’t pretend that hope will win out over pain every day. It won’t.

Answer 9

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 10

“Option A is not available. So let’s just kick the shit out of Option B. ”.

Answer 10

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 11

Psychologist Martin Seligman found that three P’s can stunt recovery: (1) personalization—the belief that we are at fault; (2) pervasiveness—the belief that an event will affect all areas of our life; and (3) permanence—the belief that the aftershocks of the event will last forever.

Answer 11

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 12

Not everything that happens to us happens because of us.

Answer 12

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 13

Over the next few months, the thing I found myself saying most often was, “I’m sorry. ”.

Answer 13

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 14

Banish the word “sorry. ” He also vetoed “I apologize,” “I regret that,”.

Answer 14

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 15

By blaming myself I was delaying my recovery,.

Answer 15

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 16

In the Jewish tradition, there is a seven-day intense mourning period known as shiva,.

Answer 16

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 17

People need to feel supported and understood at work. I now know that this is even more important after tragedy.

Answer 17

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 18

After the death of a loved one, only 60 percent of private sector workers get paid time off—and usually just a few days.

Answer 18

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 19

When we’re suffering, we tend to project it out indefinitely.

Answer 19

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 20

We tend to overestimate how long negative events will affect us.

Answer 20

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 21

Just as the body has a physiological immune system, the brain has a psychological immune system. When something goes wrong, we instinctively marshal defense mechanisms. We see silver linings in clouds. We add sugar and water to lemons. We start clinging to clichés.

Answer 21

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 22

Seligman found that words like “never” and “always” are signs of permanence. Just as I had to banish “sorry” from my vocabulary, I tried to eliminate “never” and “always” and replace them with “sometimes” and “lately. ”.

Answer 22

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 23

Cognitive behavioral therapy technique where you write down a belief that’s causing you anguish and then follow it with proof that the belief is false.

Answer 23

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 24

Humans are evolutionarily wired for both connection and grief: we naturally have the tools to recover from loss and trauma.

Answer 24

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 25

Old Jewish tradition, like rejecting the first table offered in a restaurant.

Answer 25

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 26

Psychologists asked a group of people to make a weekly list of five things for which they were grateful. Another group wrote about hassles and a third listed ordinary events. Nine weeks later, the gratitude group felt significantly happier and reported fewer health problems.

Answer 26

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 27

Resilience comes from deep within us and from support outside us. It comes from gratitude for what’s good in our lives and from leaning in to the suck.

Answer 27

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 28

I learned that when life pulls you under, you can kick against the bottom, break the surface, and breathe again. 2.

Answer 28

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 29

Even people who have endured the worst suffering often want to talk about it.

Answer 29

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 30

Survivors want the opportunity to teach and not be shunned because they went through something unknowable,”.

Answer 30

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 31

These aren’t personal questions. They are human questions,”.

Answer 31

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 32

Avoiding feelings isn’t the same as protecting feelings.

Answer 32

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 33

“Our child dies a second time when no one speaks their name. ”.

Answer 33

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 34

“mum effect” for when people avoid sharing bad news.

Answer 34

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 35

“For the victim of racism, like the victim of loss, the silence is crippling. The two things we want to know when we’re in pain are that we’re not crazy to feel the way we do and that we have support.

Answer 35

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 36

Psychologists literally call them “openers. ” Unlike non-question-asking friends, openers ask a lot of questions and listen to the answers without judging.

Answer 36

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 37

That the most helpful support usually comes from those who have suffered similar losses.

Answer 37

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 38

Opening up about traumatic events can improve mental and physical health.

Answer 38

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 39

“I know you don’t know yet what will happen—and neither do I. But you won’t go through this alone. I will be there with you every step of the way. ”.

Answer 39

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 40

“When you’re faced with tragedy, you usually find that you’re no longer surrounded by people—you’re surrounded by platitudes.

Answer 40

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 41

None of the participants actually pressed the button. Stopping the noise didn’t make the difference…knowing they could stop the noise did. The button gave them a sense of control and allowed them to endure the stress.

Answer 41

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 42

When people are in pain, they need a button.

Answer 42

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 43

The friend stopped talking to Alycia, choosing escape over empathy.

Answer 43

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 44

My closest friends and family convinced me that they truly wanted to help, which made me feel like less of a burden.

Answer 44

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 45

Caring means that when someone is hurting, you cannot imagine being anywhere else.

Answer 45

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 46

But when people made their predictions just ten minutes after removing their arm from the ice water, they made the same estimates as the warm water group. Once the icy water was behind them, even for just minutes, they couldn’t quite fathom what it felt like to be cold.

Answer 46

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 47

But when someone is suffering, instead of following the Golden Rule, we need to follow the Platinum Rule: treat others as they want to be treated.

Answer 47

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 48

Author Bruce Feiler believes the problem lies in the offer to “do anything. ” He writes that “while well meaning, this gesture unintentionally shifts the obligation to the aggrieved. Instead of offering ‘anything,’ just do something. ”.

Answer 48

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 49

A friend texted him, “What do you NOT want on a burger?” Dan appreciated the effort. “Instead of asking if I wanted food, he made the choice for me but gave me the dignity of feeling in control. ”.

Answer 49

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 50

Specific acts help because instead of trying to fix the problem, they address the damage caused by the problem.

Answer 50

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 51

Psychologists put teenage girls under stress by asking them to give a spontaneous public speech. When mothers and daughters who were close held hands, the physical contact took away some of the daughters’ anxiety. The daughters sweated less and the physiological stress was transferred to the mothers.

Answer 51

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 52

Psychologist Susan Silk, who devised the “ring theory. ” She suggests writing down the names of people in the center of the tragedy and drawing a circle around them. Then draw a bigger circle around that one and write the names of the people who are next most affected by the event. Keep drawing larger circles.

Answer 52

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 53

Wherever you are in the circle, offer comfort in and seek comfort out. That means consoling the people who are closer to the tragedy than you are and reaching out for support from those who are farther removed.

Answer 53

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 54

I hated asking for help, hated needing it, worried incessantly that I was a huge burden to everyone, and yet depended on their constant support.

Answer 54

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 55

Friendship isn’t only what you can give, it’s what you’re able to receive.

Answer 55

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 56

They are five states that don’t progress in a linear fashion but rise and fall. Grief and anger aren’t extinguished like flames doused with water. They can flicker away one moment and burn hot the next.

Answer 56

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 57

I used to think there was one set of footprints because my friends were carrying me through the worst days of my life. But now it means something else to me. When I saw one set of footprints, it was because they were following directly behind me, ready to catch me if I fell.

Answer 57

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 58

Self-compassion isn’t talked about as much as it should be, maybe because it’s often confused with its troublesome cousins, self-pity and self-indulgence.

Answer 58

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 59

Psychologist Kristin Neff describes self-compassion as offering the same kindness to ourselves that we would give to a friend.

Answer 59

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 60

In a study of people whose marriages fell apart, resilience was not related to their self-esteem, optimism, or depression before divorce, or to how long their relationships or separations had lasted. What helped people cope with distress and move on was self-compassion.

Answer 60

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 61

For soldiers returning from war in Afghanistan and Iraq, those who were kind to themselves showed significant declines in symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Answer 61

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 62

Self-compassion is associated with greater happiness and satisfaction, fewer emotional difficulties, and less anxiety.

Answer 62

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 63

This is why confession in the Catholic religion begins with “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned,” not “Forgive me, Father, for I am a sinner. ”.

Answer 63

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 64

Blaming our actions rather than our character allows us to feel guilt instead of shame.

Answer 64

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 65

Among college students, the shame-prone were more likely than the guilt-prone to have drug and alcohol problems. Prisoners who felt ashamed were 30 percent more likely to commit repeat offenses than those who felt guilty. Elementary and middle school kids who felt shame were more hostile and aggressive, while guilt-prone kids were more likely to defuse conflicts.

Answer 65

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 66

It helped me quiet myself and reflect. I was able to put words to my feelings and unpack them. ” Writing can be a powerful tool for learning self-compassion.

Answer 66

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 67

Psychologist Jamie Pennebaker had two groups of college students journal for fifteen minutes a day for just four days—some about nonemotional topics and others about the most traumatic experiences of their lives, which included rape, attempted suicide, and child abuse. After the first day of writing, the second group was less happy and had higher blood pressure. This made sense, since confronting trauma is painful. But when Pennebaker followed up six months later, the effects reversed and those who wrote about their traumas were significantly better off emotionally and physically.

Answer 67

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 68

Writing about traumatic events can decrease anxiety and anger, boost grades, reduce absences from work, and lessen the emotional impact of job loss.

Answer 68

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 69

Immediately after a tragedy or crisis, journaling can backfire: the event is too raw for some to process. After loss, it appears that writing can reduce loneliness and improve mood but does not necessarily help with grief or depression symptoms.

Answer 69

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 70

Philosopher Søren Kierkegaard said that life can only be understood backward but it must be lived forward.

Answer 70

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 71

Journaling helped me make sense of the past and rebuild my self-confidence to navigate the present and future.

Answer 71

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 72

Counting our blessings doesn’t boost our confidence or our effort, but counting our contributions can.

Answer 72

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 73

Empathy was nice but encouragement was better.

Answer 73

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 74

Cancer survivors were less likely to get called back for job interviews.

Answer 74

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 75

Changed the way I interact with coworkers going through difficult personal situations. I still always start by offering them time off. But now I understand the importance of treating them as regular members of the team and praising their work as well.

Answer 75

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 76

The costs of placing a four-year-old and an infant in child care exceed annual median rent payments in every state.

Answer 76

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 77

Single mothers have the highest rates of poverty in America and are almost twice as likely to be poor as single fathers.

Answer 77

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 78

In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. —ALBERT CAMUS.

Answer 78

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 79

“When we are no longer able to change a situation,” psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl observed, “we are challenged to change ourselves.

Answer 79

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 80

As time passed, instead of post-traumatic stress, some of the parents experienced post-traumatic growth.

Answer 80

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 81

Post-traumatic growth could take five different forms: finding personal strength, gaining appreciation, forming deeper relationships, discovering more meaning in life, and seeing new possibilities.

Answer 81

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 82

“I am more vulnerable than I thought, but much stronger than I ever imagined. ”.

Answer 82

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 83

‘He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how. ’.

Answer 83

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 84

I celebrate every one because I no longer take for granted that the next birthday will come.

Answer 84

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 85

Tragedy can also motivate people to develop new and deeper relationships.

Answer 85

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 86

“In prosperity our friends know us. In adversity we know our friends. ”.

Answer 86

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 87

Viktor Frankl’s words, “In some way, suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning. ”.

Answer 87

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 88

I was not going to be a product of my DNA. I was going to be a product of my actions,”.

Answer 88

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 89

When they measured my stature, they failed to measure my heart. ”.

Answer 89

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 90

On days when people think they’ve had a meaningful impact on others at work, they feel more energized at home and more capable of dealing with difficult situations.

Answer 90

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 91

“raise your hand if Dave Goldberg did something to change your life for the better—provided.

Answer 91

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 92

Don’t make any big decisions in the early stages of acute grief.

Answer 92

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 93

After trauma, some people ended up choosing different directions for their lives that they never would have considered before.

Answer 93

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 94

People help where they’ve been hurt so that their wounds are not in vain.

Answer 94

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 95

Philosopher Seneca (and the song “Closing Time”): “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end. ”.

Answer 95

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 96

There should be a word for the joy you feel when your kids are friends with your friends’ kids.

Answer 96

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 97

Survivor guilt is a thief of joy—yet another secondary loss from death.

Answer 97

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 98

A life chasing pleasure without meaning is an aimless existence. Yet a meaningful life without joy is a depressing one.

Answer 98

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 99

When we focus on others, we find motivation that is difficult to marshal for ourselves alone.

Answer 99

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 100

Just as we need to be kind to ourselves when we make mistakes, we also need to be kind to ourselves by enjoying life when we can.

Answer 100

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 101

Tragedy breaks down your door and takes you prisoner. To escape takes effort and energy. Seeking joy after facing adversity is taking back what was stolen from you.

Answer 101

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 102

Bono has said, “Joy is the ultimate act of defiance. ”.

Answer 102

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 103

“Both deaths are woven into the fabric of my life, but they’re not what define me,” she said. “Joy is very important to me. And I can’t count on joy to come from my daughter or anyone else. It has to come from me.

Answer 103

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 104

Happiness is the frequency of positive experiences, not the intensity.

Answer 104

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 105

“How we spend our days,” author Annie Dillard writes, is “how we spend our lives. ”.

Answer 105

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 106

Tim Urban describes it, happiness is the joy you find on hundreds of forgettable Wednesdays.

Answer 106

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 107

Paying attention to moments of joy takes effort because we are wired to focus on the negatives more than the positives. Bad events tend to have a stronger effect on us than good events.

Answer 107

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 108

Writing about joyful experiences for just three days can improve people’s moods and decrease their visits to health centers a full three months later.

Answer 108

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 109

As we get older, we define happiness less in terms of excitement and more in terms of peacefulness.

Answer 109

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 110

People don’t report being happy while they are in flow. They are so engaged that they only describe it as joyful afterward.

Answer 110

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 111

Exercise as one of the best ways to improve psychological well-being.

Answer 111

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 112

There are more refugees today than there have been at any time since World War II;.

Answer 112

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 113

“A good painting is a lot of good decisions,”.

Answer 113

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 114

A knack for reframing painful events.

Answer 114

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 115

Respond to embarrassment with humor.

Answer 115

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 116

His own reaction to his disability influenced how others reacted, which meant he could control how he was perceived.

Answer 116

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 117

I would never wish for anyone to gain this perspective—but perspective it is.

Answer 117

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 118

Is not a fixed personality trait. It’s a lifelong project.

Answer 118

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 119

Helping children develop four core beliefs: (1) they have some control over their lives; (2) they can learn from failure; (3) they matter as human beings; and (4) they have real strengths to rely on and share.

Answer 119

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 120

Change Your Shoes that helps young women see that the trauma in their past does not determine their future.

Answer 120

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 121

Carol Dweck has shown that children respond better to adversity when they have a growth mindset instead of a fixed one.

Answer 121

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 122

But when kids were praised for trying, they worked harder on the challenging test and made more of an effort to finish it.

Answer 122

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 123

The Trevor Project, LGBTQ youths have 24/7 access to free counseling by text and phone.

Answer 123

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 124

In Denmark, mattering is part of the school curriculum. During a weekly hour called Klassen Time, students come together to discuss problems and help one another. Danish children do this every week from age six until they graduate from high school.

Answer 124

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 125

Teachers are told students from stigmatized groups have potential to bloom, the teachers begin to treat them differently. They help students learn from failure. They set high expectations, give students extra attention, and actively encourage them to develop their strengths.

Answer 125

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 126

Giving kids a sense of stability was essential at a time when their world is turned upside down.

Answer 126

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 127

Kids have more neural plasticity than adults, allowing their brains to adapt more easily in the face of stress.

Answer 127

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 128

Children have limits to how much intense emotion they can process at once. They have shorter “feeling spans”; their grief comes more in bursts than in sustained periods.

Answer 128

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 129

Kids also sometimes express their grief through behavior changes and play rather than in words.

Answer 129

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 130

“fast double-sorries”—when two people hurt each other’s feelings, you both apologize quickly so that you forgive each other and yourselves.

Answer 130

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 131

Asking for help is in all four categories. Now I see that this is at the heart of building resilience.

Answer 131

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 132

When children grow up with a strong understanding of their family’s history—where their grandparents grew up, what their parents’ childhoods were like—they have better coping skills and a stronger sense of belonging.

Answer 132

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 133

Talking openly about positive and even difficult memories can help develop resilience. It’s especially powerful to share stories about how the family sticks together through good times and bad,.

Answer 133

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 134

“Nostalgia” comes from the Greek words nostos and algos, which mean “return” and “pain. ” Nostalgia is literally the suffering that we feel when we yearn for the past to come back to us, yet psychologists find that it is mostly a pleasant state.

Answer 134

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 135

After people reflect on an event, they tend to feel happier and more connected to others.

Answer 135

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 136

FAF, which is short for “Family Awesome Fun. ”.

Answer 136

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 137

As individuals, we feel weaker on some days than on others. But as a family we are stronger together.

Answer 137

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 138

Every survivor’s story shared a common theme: a key to their resilience was hope.

Answer 138

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 139

We normally think of hope as something individuals hold in their heads and in their hearts. But people can build hope together. By creating a shared identity, individuals can form a group that has a past and a brighter future.

Answer 139

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 140

“To maintain faith at all times, despite our setbacks, we had to become alchemists,” survivor Javier Methol said. “Changing tragedy into a miracle, depression into hope. ”.

Answer 140

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 141

Resilience is not just built in individuals. It is built among individuals—in our neighborhoods, schools, towns, and governments. When we build resilience together, we become stronger ourselves and form communities that can overcome obstacles and prevent adversity. Collective resilience requires more than just shared hope—it is also fueled by shared experiences, shared narratives, and shared power.

Answer 141

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 142

“When we suffer loss or face difficulties of any kind, there is a real desire deep in most people for human connection,” explained Kara’s executive director Jim Santucci,.

Answer 142

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 143

Deep human connection. It is not just ‘Oh, I feel bad for you’ but ‘I actually understand. ’ ”.

Answer 143

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 144

For anger, kids used chalk to scrawl words that made them angry on the pavement. Some wrote “bullying”; others wrote “cancer” or “drugs. ” Then on the count of three they threw water balloons on the ground to smear the words away and release their anger.

Answer 144

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 145

At a second station, a camper held a brick representing guilt. As the brick became too heavy, another camper shared the burden of its weight. These exercises helped show my children that their emotions were normal and other kids felt them too.

Answer 145

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 146

The club that no one wants to belong to is incredibly bonding. Perhaps because none of us wanted to join, we cling to one another.

Answer 146

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 147

The Underground Scholars Initiative, a group that supports Berkeley students affected by incarceration.

Answer 147

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 148

The Posse Foundation is another organization founded on the importance of grouping students with similar backgrounds to combat feelings of isolation.

Answer 148

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 149

Since 1989, Posse has helped nearly seven thousand students attend college with a 90 percent graduation rate.

Answer 149

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 150

Collective stories create identity for communities.

Answer 150

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 151

When college students were reminded of their gender before taking a math test, women performed 43 percent worse than men. When the exact same test was called a “problem-solving test” instead of a “math test,” the gender gap in performance vanished.

Answer 151

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 152

“stereotype threat”: the fear of being reduced to a negative stereotype. That fear becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy when anxiety disrupts our thinking and causes us to conform to the stereotype.

Answer 152

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 153

Often the people fighting injustice are themselves the victims of injustice.

Answer 153

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 154

Some of the world’s greatest achievements have been rooted in personal tragedies.

Answer 154

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 155

Journalist Antoine Leiris, whose wife Hélène was killed in a 2015 Paris terrorist attack. Just two days later he wrote, “On Friday night, you stole the life of an exceptional being, the love of my life, the mother of my son, but you will not have my hate…. I will not give you the satisfaction of hating you. ”.

Answer 155

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 156

“Moral elevation” describes the feeling of being uplifted by an act of uncommon goodness. Elevation brings out what Abraham Lincoln called “the better angels of our nature. ”.

Answer 156

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 157

Martin Luther King Jr. Said, “Let no man pull you so low as to hate him. ”.

Answer 157

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 158

“What unites us is stronger than what divides us,”.

Answer 158

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 159

Resilient communities have strong social ties—bonds between people, bridges between groups, and links to local leaders.

Answer 159

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 160

This work made me acutely aware that even the most heroic examples of individual resilience can be inadequate in the face of poverty and untreated illness. When people with leprosy were kicked out of their villages, no amount of individual resilience could have helped them.

Answer 160

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 161

Empowering communities builds collective resilience.

Answer 161

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 162

In China, women who are single past the age of twenty-seven are stigmatized as sheng nu, or “leftover women. ”.

Answer 162

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 163

Being part of a community can give us strength that we sometimes can’t find on our own.

Answer 163

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 164

We find our humanity—our will to live and our ability to love—in our connections to one another.

Answer 164

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 165

The more times a government or company had failed, the more likely they were to put a rocket into orbit successfully on the next try.

Answer 165

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 166

Their chances of success increased after a rocket exploded compared to a smaller failure.

Answer 166

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 167

Not only do we learn more from failure than success, we learn more from bigger failures because we scrutinize them more closely.

Answer 167

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 168

Elon had asked for the top ten risks in advance of the launch, and the problem that caused the failure turned out to be number eleven. Pro tip: ask for top eleven risks.

Answer 168

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 169

Just as all people need resilience, all organizations do too.

Answer 169

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 170

To be resilient after failures, we have to learn from them. Most of the time, we know this; we just don’t do it. We’re too insecure to admit mistakes to ourselves or too proud to admit them to others. Instead of opening up, we get defensive and shut down.

Answer 170

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 171

Creating a culture that encourages individuals to acknowledge their missteps and regrets.

Answer 171

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 172

The majority of regrets were about failures to act, not actions that failed.

Answer 172

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 173

Psychologists have found that over time we usually regret the chances we missed, not the chances we took.

Answer 173

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 174

When things went wrong at work, it was important to me that the people responsible for the mistake acknowledge it.

Answer 174

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 175

Try hard things and discuss failures openly.

Answer 175

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 176

Teams that focus on learning from failure outperform those that don’t,.

Answer 176

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 177

Gathering and acting on negative feedback is how you reach your potential.

Answer 177

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 178

Although fishing for compliments hurts your reputation, asking for criticism signals that you care about improving.

Answer 178

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 179

One of the best ways to see ourselves clearly is to ask others to hold up a mirror.

Answer 179

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 180

“The measure of who we are is how we react to something that doesn’t go our way,”.

Answer 180

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 181

Accepting feedback is easier when you don’t take it personally.

Answer 181

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 182

“After every low score you receive,” law professors Doug Stone and Sheila Heen advise, you should “give yourself a ‘second score’ based on how you handle the first score…. Even when you get an F for the situation itself, you can still earn an A+ for how you deal with it. ”.

Answer 182

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 183

The ability to listen to feedback is a sign of resilience,.

Answer 183

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 184

Building resilient teams and organizations takes open and honest communication. When companies fail, it’s usually for reasons that almost everyone knows but almost no one has voiced.

Answer 184

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 185

One of my favorite posters on our office walls reads, “Nothing at Facebook is someone else’s problem. ”.

Answer 185

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 186

Carolyn Everson, who runs our global sales teams, shares her performance reviews in an internal Facebook group with 2,400 members. She wants her entire team to see how she’s working to improve.

Answer 186

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 187

“I wanted to be a role model in that perfect ‘put together’ sense. Instead, I told them I had cancer and would need their support. ” Their response blew her away. Caryn’s teammates pulled together to help—and.

Answer 187

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 188

It turns out that people who choose to be single are very satisfied with their lives.

Answer 188

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 189

In the Jewish religion, mourning for a parent, child, or sibling is a year, but mourning for a spouse is just thirty days. “The rabbis wanted people to move forward,” he said.

Answer 189

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 190

Widows continue to face cruel treatment around the world. In some parts of India, widows are cast away by their own families, left to beg to survive.

Answer 190

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 191

Still, dating does not erase my grief. All of us in the club understand this. You can miss your spouse and be with someone else,.

Answer 191

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 192

“I almost hate to say this, but I am the happiest I have ever been in my life,” she told me. “Sometimes it takes going through something so awful to realize the beauty that is out there in this world. ”.

Answer 192

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 193

Brain scans of people in love reveal an intoxicating state of energy and euphoria. After we fall in love, we gain confidence and self-esteem and expand our identities.

Answer 193

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 194

If love is the third rail of grief, laughter is equally charged. In the face of death, it feels wildly inappropriate to joke about anything.

Answer 194

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 195

Humor can make us more resilient. Surgery patients who watch comedies request 25 percent less pain medication. Soldiers who make jokes deal better with stress. People who laugh naturally six months after losing a spouse cope better. Couples who laugh together are more likely to stay married. Physiologically, humor lowers our heart rate and relaxes our muscles. Evolutionarily, humor is a signal that a situation is safe. Laughter breaks tension by making stressful situations less threatening.

Answer 195

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 196

Mel Brooks said he made fun of Hitler and the Nazis because “if you can reduce them to ridicule then you’re way ahead. ”.

Answer 196

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 197

One of the most important things I’ve learned is how deeply you can keep loving someone after they die.

Answer 197

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 198

Psychologists find that when people are falling in love, even arguments make them more attracted to each other.

Answer 198

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 199

The newlyweds who stayed together over the next six years turned toward each other 86 percent of the time, while couples who got divorced turned toward each other only 33 percent. Most of the couples’ fights weren’t about money or sex but about “failed bids for connection. ”.

Answer 199

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 200

There were three parties in any relationship: you, the other person, and the relationship itself. The relationship is a meaningful entity that needs to be protected and nurtured.

Answer 200

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 201

In the couples whose marriages lasted, instead of escalating negativity, both partners showed humor and affection. They took responsibility for their problems and found ways to compromise. They sent signals that even though they were fighting, at a deeper level, they were okay.

Answer 201

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 202

Resilience in love means finding strength from within that you can share with others. Finding a way to make love last through the highs and lows. Finding your own way to love when life does not work out as planned. Finding the hope to love and laugh again when love is cruelly taken from you. And finding a way to hang on to love even when the person you love is gone.

Answer 202

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 203

Grief has to unfold.

Answer 203

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 204

Tragedy does not have to be personal, pervasive, or permanent, but resilience can be.

Answer 204

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

Question 205

Arianna Huffington reminded us that people read not just to learn but to hope.

Answer 205

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant