QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 1

While in the past we may have wanted loyal employees, today we need flexible people who are not possessive about “the way things are done around here.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 2

definition of the QBQ: A tool that enables individuals to practice personal accountability by making better choices in the moment.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 3

with the way he thought, would be so quickly on his way up “the ladder of success.” That’s the difference personal accountability can make.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 4

The idea that we are accountable for our own choices and are free to make better ones is fundamental to the QBQ.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 5

One of the guiding principles of the QBQ is “The answers are in the questions,” which speaks to the same truth: If we ask ourselves a better question, we get a better answer. So the QBQ is about asking better questions.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 6

three simple guidelines for creating a QBQ: 1. Begin with “What” or “How” (not “Why,” “When,” or “Who”). 2. Contain an “I” (not “they,” “we,” or “you”). 3. Focus on action. “What can I do?” for example, follows the guidelines perfectly.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 7

I asked a department manager once how many people worked for him, and he said, “About half!” It’s a funny response,

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 8

“What I really do is help people—including myself—eliminate victim thinking from their lives.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 9

The best thing we can do to get rid of victim thinking in our world is to get rid of it in ourselves.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 10

stress is a choice, because whatever the “trigger event,” we always choose our own response. We choose to react angrily. We choose to stuff our emotions and keep quiet. We choose to worry.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 11

The truth is, different people have different reactions to the same situation. Stress is a choice. Stress is also the result of our choices.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 12

When we choose to ask a question like “Why is this happening to me?” we feel as if we have no control. This leads us to a victim mindset, which is extremely stressful.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 13

Even in cases where we actually are victims and our feelings seem justified, Why me? thinking only adds to our stress.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 14

When Stacey was twelve years old, she and her father, a pilot, took off on a Sunday afternoon joyride in their single-engine Cessna. Not long into the flight, and about a mile up over Lake Michigan, the joy of their father-daughter adventure came to an abrupt halt. The engine quit.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 15

“The reality is if a strategy or tactic is working now, the odds are high that it won’t work in the future.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 16

When faced with a new situation, Stacey’s dad took action and solved the problem.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 17

When we ask “When?” we’re really saying we have no choice but to wait and put off action until another time. Questions that begin with “When” lead to procrastination.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 18

I don’t believe most people intend to procrastinate. Certainly no one ever gets out of bed and says, “Today, I’m going to procrastinate!”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 19

“Long-range, strategic planning is a great tool, but we need to get some things done before lunch!”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 20

Let’s take care of the little things while they’re still little.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 21

Focusing on what we don’t have is a waste of time and energy and kills innovation.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 22

We don’t need the “new” thing or the “hot” topic. What we need to do is stay away from fads and practice the fundamentals—like personal accountability—day in and day out.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 23

When we ask “Who?” questions like these, what we’re really doing is looking for scapegoats, someone else to blame.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 24

A Poor Sailor Blames the Wind

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 25

For all the time and resources our organizations spend on team-building, we still seem to forget one simple truth: We’re all on the same team.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 26

Who is the “ref” in your life? What person or circumstance beyond your control is standing between you and success?

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 27

The Ultimate QBQ: “How can I let go of what I can’t control?”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 28

When she got to me, I stopped her and said, “You know, Bonita, I really appreciate your attitude!” As she sashayed away with that big smile on her face and the Santa Claus cap on her head, she said, “Well, whatever you do, don’t drug test me!”

Answer 28

QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 29

“Ownership does not require having an equity stake in the organization or holding an official position of leadership. It simply means facing problems head-on instead of blaming, complaining, procrastinating, or making excuses.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 30

Would you watch a bald eagle soar and say, “I wish he could swim the seas like a dolphin”? Would you look at a dolphin and hope it someday might reach the heavens like a giraffe?

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 31

“A true teammate is someone who can look right through you and still enjoy the view.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 32

“How can I appreciate people’s gifts and strengths just as they are?”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 33

successful teams are based on individuals who practice personal accountability.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 34

if everyone is asking, “What can we do?” then nobody is asking, “What can I do?”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 35

All QBQs contain an “I,” not “they,” “we,” or “you.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 36

“I believe it’s my job to change people—I’m a manager!” Sorry. Managers don’t change people. They can coach, counsel, teach, and guide, but no one changes another person. Change only comes from the inside, as a result of decisions made by the individual.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 37

a list of “Ps”: Products, Programs, Policies, Processes, Procedures, Pricing, and People.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 38

How much better things would be if we all tried to mold and shape our own thoughts and actions rather than those of others.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 39

The easiest thing to spot is gaps of integrity in others:

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 40

The definition of integrity is this: Being what I say I am by acting in accordance with my words.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 41

Does what we say about our organization while we’re at work match what we say at home?

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 42

Believe or leave.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 43

if your organization is no longer a vehicle to help you reach your life goals, why stay?

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 44

“What can we do?” The problem is, “we” don’t change.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 45

Personal accountability isn’t about hiding behind the team and making excuses. And it certainly is not about changing others. It’s about making a difference by changing ourselves.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 46

the Serenity Prayer: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 47

grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know—it’s me!”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 48

no public figure is a role model for our kids. That’s our job—yours and mine.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 49

Modeling is the most powerful of all teachers.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 50

“How can I set a better example?” Who’s watching you?

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 51

To make a QBQ action-focused, we add verbs such as “do,” “make,” “achieve,” and “build” to questions that start with “What” or “How” and contain an “I.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 52

The practice of personal accountability: We discipline our thoughts. We ask better questions. We take action.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 53

Action, even when it leads to mistakes, brings learning and growth. Inaction brings stagnation and atrophy.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 54

Action leads us toward solutions. Inaction does nothing and holds us in the past. • Action requires courage. Inaction often indicates fear. • Action builds confidence; inaction, doubt.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 55

“It’s better to be one who is told to wait than one who waits to be told.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 56

Leadership, more than anything else, is about the way we think. It’s a moment-to-moment disciplining of our thoughts. It’s about practicing personal accountability and choosing to make a positive contribution, no matter what our role or “level.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 57

“As a leader, I’m here to help you reach your goals.”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 58

For most of us, defining boundaries—where my accountability ends and another’s begins—is a lifelong process.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 59

Management IQs: “Why doesn’t the younger generation want to work?” “When will we find good people?” “Why aren’t they motivated?” “Who made the mistake?” “Why can’t people come in on time?” “When will they get engaged?” QBQs: “How can I be a more effective coach?” “What can I do to better understand each person I manage?” “How can I build a stronger team?”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 60

Executive IQs: “Who dropped the ball?” “When are they going to catch the vision?” “Who’s going to care as much as I do?” “When will the market turn around?” QBQs: “How can I be a better leader?” “What can I do to show I care?” “How can I communicate more effectively?”

Answer 60

QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 61

The spirit of the QBQ is personal accountability: • No more victim thinking, complaining, procrastinating, or blaming. • I can only change me. • Take action!

Answer 61

QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 62

it’s possible to construct a question that follows the letter of the QBQ but conflicts with the spirit. Consider these: “What can I do to make you change?” “How can I avoid responsibility in this matter?” “What action can I take right now to do the wrong thing?” Or Michael’s favorite, when he was about twelve, “Who can I blame today?”

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 63

If a question conflicts with the spirit of the QBQ, it isn’t a QBQ.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 64

It’s not about asking better questions of our coworkers, customers, or family. It’s about asking better questions of ourselves.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 65

Wisdom: what we learn after we know it all.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 66

Learning equals change. If we haven’t changed we haven’t learned.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 67

Repetition is the motor of learning. What’s that again? Repetition is the motor of learning. I beg your pardon? Repetition is … OK, I get it!

Answer 67

QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 68

If our focus is whining and complaining instead of moving forward, pointing fingers rather than solving the problem, or putting action off and doing nothing to contribute, that’s a problem!

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 69

blame solves no problems.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 70

Nothing destroys a team faster than blame, procrastination, victim thinking, and complaining.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller

Question 71

a person’s thoughts and behaviors are always a result of the choices they make.

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QBQ! The Question Behind the Question by @QBQJohn Miller